I dreaded you. I denied you would ever come. I claimed you weren’t a possibility for me. I vowed to do 1,000 squats and deadlifts a day just please, PLEASE no Mom Bum. I certainly thought my life would be miserable if you arrived, dear Mom Bum, but I must admit how wrong I have been, and I sincerely apologize.
One time Squat Bum and I were at the gym… definitely trying to keep you out of our life…ahem.. when a lady asked me where I got Squat Bum. Awkward yes. But I knew nobody wanted your flat little self, so Squat Bum got a little proud and puffed up. Nobody ever asks about you Mom Bum, and I thought I would have died 1,000 deaths if they ever did! But the beautiful thing is that I wouldn’t mind telling them one bit, now that I understand your connection to my life now.
Mom bum, you are the direct result of the happiest time in my life thus far.”
I have two incredible children who I’ve each spent hours with on the couch feeding to keep alive, happy and healthy. Thanks for being there for me Mom Bum. Squat Bum bailed faster than you can say “flat as a pancake.” I have also spent hours on that same couch reading countless stories to my two lovelies and you have also been there through those moments from thick to…. thin. You’re a champ!
I have walked miles and miles with my children and seen them laugh and cry, giggle and squeal creating so much joy within me I feel that I could burst. You were there too. No, not helping me get a new personal record for how much I can clean jerk, but now easily moving me along the beautiful, steady road with my children. Here’s to you!
Mom Bum, you are the result of sitting around a dinner table with my family finally, after so many years of eating meals on the run. Volleyball, school or something else much “more” important needed to be attended to and there wasn’t much time for family bonding. Those are some of my favorite moments, so thank you.
Mom Bum, you are the result of hours spent in the car driving to grandma’s house, to the grocery store or to the park where we sit together on that hard bench just because it makes our world go round to see Little Miss Toddler’s cute dimples as she laughs her heart out going down the twisty slide. I want to make Little Miss Toddler happy, I like to make her happy. Thanks for helping.
Mom Bum, you are the result of sleepless nights spent on sick children, and groggy days then spent catching up. Squat Bum didn’t spend ANY time cleaning up puke, so I thank you. We are the best team.
And Mom Bum? You look so dang good in those stretchy pants and skinny jeans, don’t you even worry. You know why? Because you are workin’ them good while you wash dishes, wipe Baby Bum, meal prep and grocery shop, supervise homework, cook dinner, swat Husband Bum and hug the man of your dreams. So don’t you be jealous of Squat Bum and her leggings. You fit yours perfectly and I’m grateful to have you around.
Dearest Mom Bum, you are the result of the greatest blessings I have in my life right now. I’m sorry I dreaded you. You’re a true friend and I’m grateful to have you behind me.
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